Archive for April, 2010

Why Can’t You Read My Mind?

April 6, 2010

Bernstein, Jeffrey. Why Can’t You Read My Mind?: Overcoming 9 Toxic Thought Patterns That Get in the Way of a Loving Relationship.(Book Review)

People have misunderstood one another since the beginning of time–and, if the self-help genre is any indication, they continue to do so. Bernstein, a Philadelphia-based psychologist, describes “toxic” thought patterns that can damage even the healthiest relationships (readers will be reminded of those found in Clinton McLemore’s Toxic Relationships and How To Change Them), He presents the MAP plan–Mindfulness, Alternatives, Practice–as the antidote to tendencies like labeling and blaming; he also offers techniques and activities for increasing intimacy, like making little things count. To boot, Bernstein clearly and conversationally discusses relationships in general, making good use of explanatory material and examples. While our partners really can’t read our minds, this book does offer hope–and, refreshingly, it throws in the occasional alternative lifestyle couple. Like John Gottman’s popular The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work and Willard F. Harley Jr.’s His Needs, Her Needs for Parents: Keeping Romance Alive, this is appropriate lot most public libraries.

The review appeared in Library Journal 128.19 on November 15, 2003): p.85(1).
I shredded it on April 5, 2010.